Difficult Conversations Reveal True Leadership
Sep 02, 2024
Tomorrow's Ripple Affect
In the daily grind and pressure of leadership it's easy to have conversations to achieve immediate outcomes without considering the future ‘human impact’ implications of our interactions.
I know I’ve done it!
To often ‘the boss’ to reduces their sense of care by exercising positional power. A typical tactic is to build a 'go to' persona with self-protective emotional walls, enabling you to enter conversations lacking real empathy and connection. This can cause avoidable distress for the other party. The impact of the distress can be ongoing.
Managing Difficult Conversations
True leadership through communication manages difficult conversations, without manipulation. Done by offering respect, empathy, contextual clarity, purpose and the rightful space for the other person to speak their mind. Done even if outcomes negatively impact the other person (overlooked for promotion etc.).
My Difficult Conversations
In my early days as an emerging leader, I lacked emotional intelligence. I feared exposure, lacked vulnerability under pressure and found it difficult to adapt my view point to include other perspectives. My “go to” persona was to build a protective wall of aggression, daring anyone to challenge me and few did.
Over the years I had two people, in a workplace context, who called me out on this ‘aggression’ wall. Both did it with empathy, power and certainty: focussing on the issue: separating it from “the good me”. Free of manipulation they clarified how I needed to do better.
At the time I was deeply disturbed and more than a little resistant. However, I knew I was respected, listened to and fairly heard. This made it easier to see their point of view, self reflect and over time make changes (days not years).
Both these people got the short-term outcomes they needed but their approach rippled into my future and caused enduring benefits. I am forever grateful.
You do need a level of courage to have difficult conversations: free of bluff and conducted with a soft heart and strength of purpose. But within these conversations, true leadership is heard, seen, and felt.
The ripple effect from a healthy conversation can transform lives!
Check out how we help people deal with Difficult Conversations: Navigating Difficult Conversations
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